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This is the best way to prepare kids for Brexit

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Picture: European Parliament TV

So, the freight train that is Brexit has pulled away from the station and there's no stopping it now. 

For better, or for worse, we Brits are all locked into a decision.

(Except maybe the Scottish).

Judging by the turmoil of the last year, the next few years of negotiations are set to be fraught with tension, grandstanding, ignorance, lies snide remarks and jeering at MEPs. 

And that's just Nigel Farage.

With regards to the negotiations so far, there's been talk of appropriate tone, diplomatic dialogue, and opposing media narratives. 

But there's one key detail about the Brexit negotiations that nobody's really mentioning...

The fact that our new relationship with the EU probably won't be conducted in English.

After all, once the UK leaves the EU, there will be no remaining member states where English is the first official language. Even in Ireland, Irish Gaelic takes precedence over English.

In fact, the most widely spoken mother tongue among the EU population is German.

French is almost as widely spoken as English, and Spanish could also be a contender.  

When it comes to tense negotiations regarding trade relations and regulation agreements between Brexit Britain and the EU, the UK could be at a serious disadvantage - we're not a country known for our foreign language skills.

In the UK, it's optional to take a language to GCSE level, and nowhere is it obligatory for children to learn a foreign language at primary school level (even though language acquisition becomes increasingly difficult with age).

That implies that legally, the education system does not require any knowledge of languages other than English.

In addition, thanks to the ubiquitousness of the English language, very few high ranking jobs in the UK demand a high level of proficiency in a foreign tongue.

This is in direct contrast to the rest of the EU, where basic English would be required across a multitude of sectors - particularly with regards to tense international diplomacy.

So now, the Brexiteer rhetoric of 'foreigners out' comes back to haunt us with visceral Schadenfreude (Google translate it).

To prepare your children for the realities of living in Brexit Britain, you should probably forgo the nuclear bunker in the garden or the intense preoccupation with Marmite. 

Instead, just teach them a foreign language.


More: Show this chart to anyone who says Brexit is the 'will of the British people'

More: Germany has made its views on Brexit very clear

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