Ten reasons keeping quiet will save your relationship, and your sex life, 238,312,147 ways to keep your man happy, 5.2million ball-tingling techniques to give great head.
We're all too familiar with the type of sex advice served up to us for just shy of £4 in the super-glossy pages of women's magazines.
But hey, things used to be a lot worse.
A new video from US Glamour, sees regular modern human women react to out-dated sex tips from history.
And, to quote one participant's wholly justified reaction, "F--k you, f--k this advice, f--k everything".
While you may be kept awake at night by the words, "the passion pretzel is his new favourite sex position", which have somehow rendered themselves onto the inside of your eyelids, let's count our lucky orgasms we no longer have to put up with this:
Housework, particularly floor-scrubbing, is not only great for the female figure, but it's good for the soul. And it will help take the edge off your sexual appetite.
- Ann Landers, 1963