8 signs your relationship won't last

Joe Vesey-Byrne
Thursday 18 August 2016 12:00
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Picture: GeorgeRudy/iStock

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Redditors have been compiling the warning signs that your relationship won't last. Some of the red flags mean doom is imminent, others that it will last a while, but it'll still be one of those relationships you later claim was 'just a bit of fun'.

1. Going big on social media .

User Ucsc slug argued that using social media can be an alarm bell that a relationship won't last.

The strongest indicator of a healthy relationship is no sign of it on social media.

We've all seen the endless Instagram snaps, the couples who have each other as their profile photo, the loves shared on Bebo, the status updates about how amazing the relationship is going. And it's only been two weeks. Perhaps social media isn't to blame for the problem of going too fast too quickly, but it does put it in the public domain for all to see, and all to knowingly judge.

2. Incompatible with friends and family.

When they try to cut you off from your friends.

-Roomhunter

According to male advice website Art of the Charm, 18.9 per cent of relationships end because a partner didn't get along with friends and family. Cutting you off from them is also extremely controlling. It's important for you to have some independence in your lives, even if you're a team for the most part.

3. Just do nothing.

Convoluted perhaps, but user Romanticon says that being able to sit and do nothing together is important.

With one of my earlier dates, she was a perfectly nice girl, we got along well, had no compatibility problems... but when we sat together, with nothing to do, it felt intensely awkward. We weren't connecting on the same wavelength.

4. Doubts are an answer in themselves.

If you have to ask 'Should I get married?' or 'Should I break up' you already have your answer.

-irrationalNumber

Obviously being madly 'in love' on the first date isn't advisable, but doubts over the big questions, and entertaining the idea of a break up probably means the relationship is near the end.

5. Tumble weed of love

When every conversation with them feels like small talk.

-DrStevesMagicDrink

Sometimes that's because the main thing you do in a relationship is the bad thing, but that can only sustain a romantic entanglement for so long.

6. Overly negative interactions

One user made reference to John Gottman's 5:1 ratio, the idea that for every negative interaction in a relationship (such an argument, disrespect), a couple needs five positive interactions just to maintain the relationship.

This sounds obvious, but Gottman's ratio shows just how much effort needs to be put into a relationship in order to make it work. If you can't commit to that, it might meant things are heading south for you and your partner.

7. Blame games

If you try to discuss an issue with them so you can work through it, like adults, and they shut you down, or twist it around so you're the bad guy and they're completely blameless. People who are unable to admit or even believe that they've done wrong are not capable of having a healthy relationship.

-Ratway

This sort of suggests your partner is a psychopath, or at least verging on emotional abuse. Either way it gets in the way of longevity and is no fun for the person on the receiving end.

8. Ignoring the signs

You willfully ignore the red flags thinking 'that's no big deal'.

-Holmes02

Remember, nothing lasts forever, so don't be sad if it comes crumbling down around you in a cascade of love rubble.

More: 15 things you should never ever do in a relationship

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