ICYMI there has been a lot of news. So you'd be forgiven for allowing this sensational front page to slip under the radar.
Michael McFeat is a silly sausage.
He sparked a diplomatic incident after comparing a Kyrgyz delicacy to a 'horse's penis' and has now spoken out about his tumultuous ordeal.
The Kyrgyz people queuing out of the door for their special delicacy, the horse’s penis!!!
Michael posted his culinary musings on Facebook while working in Kyrgyzstan. He was talking about a spicy sausage known as chuchuk.
The 39-year-old, who comes from Perth, Scotland, caused widespread unrest - including a short-lived strike at the gold mine he was based at - and was eventually deported from the country. But not before a horrific nine-hour escape.
Michael talked to the Sunday Post about his ordeal - the rage that spawned on social media went much further, it turns out.
The story, published online on Monday, tells the tale of a nine-hour escape that ended in arrest and hours of terror.
Michael explained how he was smuggled out of the rural mine site in an ambulance and then transferred to a jeep.
But then, armed men then attempted to ram his vehicle off the road as he fled. His security guards left him hiding under a rucksack.
They (security guards) said, ‘Someone will come for you’. It was pitch black and I could hear cars screeching around looking for me.
I didn’t know if I’d be rescued or if I’d been left to die. I thought, ‘I’m not going to get out of this’.
I lay flat against a wall using my rucksack to hide my face. Every time a car came I just hoped no one could see me.
When Michael finally made it to the airport, he was met with his face on wanted posters and arrested. He was told that what he'd done was seen by many as a racial hate crime, which could leave him serving a five-year jail term.
The police told me my act could send Kyrgyzstan to war with the UK.
He made it back to Edinburgh in one piece and, now safely home with his wife Amanda and their children, he mentioned that he probably won't be going abroad for a little while.
I don’t think my wife will be letting me go anywhere far any time soon.
She’s been through enough.
Michael has been banned from entering the country for five years. And all because of a sausage.
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