We've dissected the players who made the greatest - even in the pejorative sense - impact at the World Cup and stitched them back up to create the definitive player.
Hat: Thiago Silva (Brazil) Hair: Marouane Fellaini (Belgium) Brain: Lionel Messi (Argentina) Face (and teeth): Luis Suarez (Uruguay) Beard: Raul Meireles (Portugal) Eyes: David Luiz (Brazil) Chest/torso: James Rodriguez and insect (Colombia / Brazil) Stomach: Joel Campbell (Costa Rica) Right arm: Tim Howard (USA) Left arm: Manuel Neuer (Germany) Right leg: Miroslav Klose (Germany) Left leg: Tim Cahill (Australia)
Before the World Cup started we attempted a similar thing, predicting who would grace the World Cup.
Hair: David Luiz (Brazil) Brain: Xavi (Spain) Face: Olivier Giroud (France) Beard: Andrea Pirlo (Italy) Torso: Yaya Toure (Ivory Coast) Right arm: Thibaut Courtois (Belgium) Left arm: Manuel Neuer (Germany) Right leg: Cristiano Ronaldo (Portugal) Left leg: Lionel Messi (Argentina)
Admittedly, we've created a couple of monsters, but imagine if these two played for your team, just imagine...
Agree/disagree with our footballing Frankenstein? Let us know in the comments below