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Katherine Cox

A woman has sparked a debate after she was left stunned when her boyfriend invited her on a trip but refused to pay for her travel.

In a post on Reddit’s Am I The A**hole forum, the woman explained that her boyfriend’s brother was having a party in another state and had invited the two of them.

When enquiring about flights, the woman’s boyfriend of three years told her that his boss was paying for his flight on an expensive airline, meaning his own travel was free.

The woman continued, explaining: “When I asked about me he said that I could catch that flight too. That flight is $300 as opposed to $112 on a cheaper airline.

“My boyfriend made it clear that he would not fly with me on the cheaper airline or help contribute to the extra $190 so that we could fly together.”

“Instead he expects me to choose - pay the extra money myself or fly alone and find my own way to his brother's house in a city I am not familiar.”

She went on to explain that her boyfriend earns around three times as much as her and also recently won $5,000, yet was still refusing to pay the difference so they could travel together.

Reiterating that she doesn’t expect her boyfriend to pay for the entire flight, she explained that she was hurt by the fact he wouldn’t offer to make any allowance for her to be able to attend the party.

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She wrote: “I was excited to go and can justify $112 but for $300 it seems excessive to pay an extra $190 while my boyfriend travels for free.

“I do not expect him to pay for my flight or the entire $190, maybe just $90 to help me out. I have never expected or even accepted my boyfriend paying for anything for me ever so this is not a common occurrence.

“I know I could just not go but I’m hurt at the fact that he wouldn’t make the sacrifice for me when I know I would do that if the roles were reversed. I don’t know if it is unrealistic to expect the same from him so that I do not have to travel alone.”

The woman asked other Redditors for their perspective on whether she had the right to be upset or not.

One person reasoned that “You can ask for his financial help, he can say no” but also admitted that it was a bit of a jerk move from the boyfriend.

Another person wrote: “NTA [not the a**hole]. You are his guest for the party, at a minimum, he should pick you up at the airport.

“I don't know what previous arrangements you had about paying for things, but if the income difference is 3x, it is a clear sign he doesn't value your company.”

Someone else commented: “Personally I would just stay home. Use the money you would have spent on a plane tickets for a spa day.”

Another Reddit user replied: “Honestly, it's a loss for you either way. You pay more and go or you pay less and still struggle to find your way to the venue.

“Either way your bf will go at his convenience, not yours. I highly suggest you don't go.”

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