James Rushton
Jun 07, 2022
Indy
A woman who ditched her corporate career has shared her 'rules' to become a stay-at-home girlfriend - including staying in your best shape, learning to cook and never dating someone for their potential.
Emily de Rean, 37, hadn’t always aspired to be a stay-at-home girlfriend but decided to quit her corporate job as a financial analyst, after her dad passed away from cancer and she realised life was too short 'to be unhappy'.
After finding love with her fiancé, Michael, 40, a business owner, he supported her decision to stop working to pursue her other passions - including writing a book, cooking and social media.
Now she hopes to become an author and can spend her time writing a book and socialising with friends - rather than being structured or 'restricted' by a job.
Emily has shared her tips for young women if they aspire to become a 'stay-at-home girlfriend' and 'create their dream life' - which include dating someone a few years older and someone open-minded.
Emily de Rean/SWNS
Emily, from Dallas, Texas, US, said: “I used to work as financial analyst and I started to realise that I didn’t want to be stuck in a corporate job all my life.
“My dad passed away and it got me thinking if this was really what I wanted to do for my short time on earth.
“I met Michael and he encouraged me to stop working - and become a stay-at-home girlfriend - so I could have time to do something more productive.
“Now I spend my hours doing what I want and have time to look after my body, cook nice meals and spend quality time with friends.
“I want to help other young women to realise their wants and needs and date accordingly. You don't have to just be a stay at home mum, you can aspire to be a young childfree woman at not work. All you need to do is find a partner that can help you achieve that lifestyle and has the same vision as you."
Sign up to our new free Indy100 weekly newsletter
As a 20-year-old, Emily went to University to study finance and worked her way up the career ladder as a financial analyst but after six years in the industry she became tired of the lack of time off and commutes.
“I wasn’t enjoying it anymore,” she said.
“My dad was dying of cancer, and he told me if you’re unhappy you should do something else.”
Taking he father’s advice, Emily quit her job and started working as a nanny instead.
“That was lovely,” she said.
“But when I met my fiancé, Michael, he told me I didn’t have to work at all if I didn’t want to. He told me I’d be able to come with him on work trips and I could do what I wanted to do with the rest of my time.”
Emily spends her time cooking, writing, and posting on social media to give advice to other young women who want to find their 'dream man' to meet their needs.
Emily de Rean/SWNS
“I love cooking and men love a home-cooked meal so that’s a plus,” she said.
“I think it’s a great tool to have.”
Emily is an advocate for not dating for potential, so women are not wasting their time on men 'who won't go anywhere' and relationships with 'no quality of life'.
“There is nothing wrong with a man who wants to be a teacher but if you’re goal is to be a stay-at-home girlfriend then he’ll never be able to provide for that," Emily said.
“You have to be choosey and only date from pool of men that meets your requirements. They need to be finanically viable for your needs. You don’t know how a man is going to end up even if he has potential. You should date the finished product.”
Emily also explains some of her red flags for dating if you want a stay-at-home lifestyle.
“If on a first date he doesn’t offer to pick you up or get you a car that’s not a good sign,” she said. "He should invite you to dinner not coffee and if he is asking to split the bill that’s a red flag.”
Emily is also wary of a man brought up by a woman who had to work a lot of jobs. "That woman is a champion but for the man it will set his subconscious to have those expectations,” she said.
"If a man has been brought up by a stay-at-home mum, then he’s been conditioned to want that already. I think the most important thing is to make sure your vision aligns with his.
“Being a stay-at-home girlfriend isn’t for everyone but if it's what you want and need, you shouldn’t be shamed for it.”
Have your say in our news democracy. Click the upvote icon at the top of the page to help raise this article through the indy100 rankings.
Top 100
The Conversation (0)