Person

24 gloriously weird wikiHow guides

Posted by in offbeat
              
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All of human life is here.


From the most basic emotions...

1.

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Top tip: "Take notice of their preferred activities, and try to initiate some time together in doing those things. "


...To the ins and outs of the heart

2.

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Top tip: "Evaluate your profile picture. The beautiful people generally only want to hang out with other equally gorgeous people. If you aren’t putting your best face forward, you’ll lose a lot of potential hot friends. And photography can make you look your absolute best, so don't fret."

3.

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Top tip: "You will find love again! Internet relationships are hard because of all the "What ifs...?". What if you don't find anyone else? What if they really are 'the one'? What if it could have worked out? What if they lied about everything they said?"


... and the mind

4.

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Top tip: "If you have never used moon incense with a ritual fire, you should practice a few times. Flames will leap up along the dust trail of this incense powder, so you must be extremely careful."


To everyday skills

5.

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Top tip: "Wear jeans that make your butt pop. Part of the allure of a donkey butt is how you present it, and a pair of jeans can either make or break a badonkadonk"

6.

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Top tip: "Make friends to help you even more try even making friends with her. She is a human, just a little chubby."

7.

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Top tip: "Employ aspects of multiple channels for your most effective means of communicating."

8.

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Top tip: "If you have a talent, e.g. Guitar or Violin, show it. Somehow brace yourself for a performance in front of the crowd."

9.

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Top tip: "Try to exude an aura of optimism around you: may it be through your words, your actions, or your composure. People who are too stiff and awkward will most likely gain notoriety in their communities, and, the community would want to forget them as much as possible."

10.

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Top tip: "Make sure you always look pretty, whether you are going to the pool, the store with your mom, your brothers basketball game, or your friends house."


Sometimes, they focus on the how but not the why

11.

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Top tip: "Sign it "Love, (insert name here)", or leave it anonymous, giving strong hints as to who you are."


(Brenda may need this one)

12.

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Top tip "What exactly has the sender written on the card? Your admirer will want you to find out who they are, so will have hopefully left a clue."


Life skills for bad-asses

13.

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Top tip: "Check the Internet [sic]."

14.

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Top tip: "Don't worry about 'passing' the test; your only concern is to not change your story."

15.

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Top tip: "You can learn to speak with a British accent if you don't already have one! Just keep your tongue towards the roof of your mouth and pronounce your words slowly to get the feel of it. It's really easy to learn and lots of fun for roleplaying with your friends."

16.

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Top tip: "Craft sticks (popsicle sticks) would meet the requirements listed above, are inexpensive, and of uniform length."

17.

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Top tip: "Go to your local shoe store and ask the persona t the counter for clown shoes. He/she will either say 'Sure thing' or 'Sorry, we don't sell clown shoes'. Now if he/she says that they don't sell clown shoes, look online. If you find some, buy them."

18.

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Top tip: "If you have athlete's foot or have not recently showered, be sure to keep your socks on."


Or on flirting without having to actually speak..

19.

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Top tip: "You should be yourself around girls, so they don't have to pretend to be someone you want."

20.

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Top tip: Spy on him and see where he's going next or after school so you randomly meet up with him and there's your chance to get him!

21.

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Top tip: "BE CAREFUL! RT-ing a tweet you don't even relate with is suicide. RT-ing is normally meant for intimate, inside jokes."


To the very, very niche

22.

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Top tip: "Practice humility. Smith has never let fame get to his head, and is a respectful guy in general."

23.

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Top tip: "Go on Wikipedia for all the references you don't understand."


To the indispensable...

24.

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Top tip: "Show respect to any Communists you know. Don't constantly criticise their beliefs. They have the same rights of opinions as you do. Ignore their beliefs and treat them based on the respect you feel they deserve."

(Pictures: Creative Commons)

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