This just in: actor George Clooney is in Scotland. He has bought a sandwich.
The media and public alike were waiting from the early hours of the morning outside Social Bite, an Edinburgh social enterprise cafe, to get a glimpse of the A-lister.
"Lucky sandwiches", the internet said in chorus.
Clooney is in Scotland to speak at the Scottish Business Awards, organised by Josh Littlejohn, who is also the co-founder of Social Bite. The five-strong chain employs formerly homeless people and customers can pay in advance for 'suspended' food and drink for anyone who needs it.
The actor seemed as happy as the crowds to be in Edinburgh this morning.
There was a fair amount of speculation on what he'd plump for.
Sadly, everyone's fun was ruined by the revelation that although Clooney had a platter of chicken and bacon sandwiches put in front of him, he didn't actually eat anything, citing time pressures.
Poor, forgotten sandwiches.
"Untouched by Hollywood hand".
Even though he didn't try the goods, Clooney praised the venture, telling reporters: "I like what they're doing, I think it's a very important cause. I think the idea that we can all participate in everyone's difficulties is really important."
Ah well. We can get back to covering the stuff that matters now.