Daughter tells parents her boyfriend is trans – and their reaction has sparked a social media storm

Harriet Brewis
Monday 07 June 2021 12:12
Identities

TikTok user Elyse (right) shared recordings of the confrontation with her parents

(@enoblehere/TikTok)

A teenager has been hailed for her bravery across social media after she shared the moment she told her parents that she’d fallen in love with a transgender man.

The young TikTok user, called Elyse, uploaded recordings of the deeply personal interaction to the platform on Saturday.

The clips offer a painful insight into the challenges people face around transphobia and the acceptance of gender identities.

In the first recording, Elyse can be heard sobbing as her furious father yells that her boyfriend is “not a boy.”

“Give me a break,” he yells repeatedly, as she weeps: “He is, he just hasn’t started testosterone yet.”

He then tells her: “You have the choice, you have the choice, but this is not the right choice and you know that, down deep inside.”

In a second recording, Elyse tells her parents that she and her boyfriend have been together for seven to eight months, at which point her dad accuses her of being “willing to give up [her] family” for “someone who doesn’t know their left from their right”.

As the teenager protests that she loves her parents “so much” and she had never intended to upset them, he continues: “I’m sorry but you’ve put a major, major wall between us.”

“This is not the way we brought you up,” his rant continues. “And if this is what you choose, we can’t change it, but these are the consequences.”

As Elyse protests that her boyfriend is “amazing” and she just wanted to be honest with her parents about their relationship, her mum chimes in: “Did you really think we were going to support it?”

The mother continues: “You made this choice knowingly, you knew what you were doing. Nobody’s holding a knife to you to go be his lover…” at which point the father interjects: “It’s not a ‘he’, Mom. It’s a ‘she’.”

The clip ends with Elyse’s dad telling her: “If you choose this path then you’re going to need to speed up being an adult really fast, OK?” before suggesting that he plans to cut her off financially.

He can then be heard storming off, as he tells her: “I would never have thought you would do this to me.”

Elyse’s recordings garnered more than 2.5 million views in just two days on TikTok alone, as users shared their admiration for her – and sadness at her parents’ response.

“The fact that [your father] is making it seem like you have to choose him or your family is horrible. Your dad chose that, not you,” one commented.

“Blood can be family, but family isn’t always blood. It took me a long time to come to that realisation but I finally learned and I’ve never been happier,” said another.

Quoting Elyse’s mum, a third wrote: “‘Did you really think we would support it?’ YES! YES! Because when you have children you sign up for loving them unconditionally.”

And a fourth added: “Leave that home. Find your family. [Your dad] has a lot of growing up, reflection and acceptance to go through.

“You are so true to you and so loved.”

Elyse filmed herself packing up her belongings after being kicked out of her family home

(enoblehere/TikTok)

In a separate video, Elyse revealed that her parents had kicked her out of the house, with her mum giving her just five minutes to gather her belongings.

She added that her dad doesn’t want to “see me or talk to me” and that, rather than speak to his daughter as she left their home, he got in his car and drove away.

Elyse said her mum then told her: “You don’t have to pack as though you’re moving out,” to which she responded: “You’re not giving me a choice.”

She stressed: “If you think it’s a choice for me to be who I am, you’re not giving me a choice.”

In a happier clip, Elyse filmed herself with boyfriend Ash, as the pair looked loved-up and content.

Confirming that she’d been kicked out of home for “being with a trans man,” she smiled defiantly and said: “Happy Pride month, everybody!”

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