Every mention of wine and cheese in the Sue Gray report

Sue Gray published her report into alleged coronavirus breaching events in Downing Street today.

That's a sentence us hacks thought we'd never get to type, as her report was delayed for months while the police did their own investigation into events, and duly handed out 126 fines over events on eight dates.

We've summarised the 60-page document here if you want to get into the nitty gritty but if you'd rather know more about what some of the events entailed and how they were... catered, we've got your back too.

Let's start with what attendees had to hydrate themselves at these dodgy gatherings. There are 20 mentions of wine in the report as Gray explains that people brought the drink to various events and that the No 10 press office regularly engaged in a pastime known as 'Wine Time Friday', or 'WTF'. Wtf indeed...

She also notes that a cleaner found red wine spilled on one wall and on a number of boxes of photocopier paper after a christmas event which took place on 18 December 2020.

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Wine not your thing? Not to worry. Beer is also mentioned four times in the report and prosecco twice. The generic term 'alcohol' gets a look in 28 times.

But what of the food? Boris Johnson recently said people who work from home aren't that productive because they go to their fridges and take chunks of cheese throughout the day. Ironically, it seems those working in Downing Street during the pandemic were doing the same as there are eight mentions of cheese in the report.

Yes, cheese features as an accompaniment to wine at the 18th December event and at a few other events as well, if you can brie-lieve it.

Staff at Downing Street also seem keen on pizza, which made its way into three events.

Responding to Gray's report, a grovelling Johnson said he was "humbled". He said he took "full responsibility" for everything that happened and urged the country to move on.

Perhaps if he offers us all a bottle of wine each?

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