You know what life is like. One day you are pottering around your garden, enjoying the weather, perhaps trimming the hedge and then all of a sudden you are covered in poo that has fallen from the skies above.

This is the very grim and disgusting reality that one man in Windsor experienced back in July when a plane passing overhead decided that his garden was the perfect spot to relieve itself of all the human sewage it was carrying.

The incident was revealed by local councillor Karen Davies during a recent meeting of The Royal Borough Of Windsor & Maidenhead’s aviation forum.

Davies from Clewer East was contacted by the unlucky constituent who’d had his “whole garden, and garden umbrellas, and him” covered in faeces.

Davies told the group over a Zoom call: “I know a number of incidents happen every year with frozen sewage from planes, but this wasn’t frozen and his whole garden was splattered in a very unpleasant way.

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“He was out in the garden at the time, so a really horrible, horrible experience. Hopefully, it never happens again to any of our residents.”

Davies added that the man, who lives centrally in Windsor, was not going to pursue an insurance claim over the incident: “Obviously he wasn’t going to do that for the sake of a couple of garden umbrellas, in terms of bumping up his premium, so he’s just sort of had to take it on the chin.”

She added that the man had contacted the airline in question, whose name has not been disclosed, who had denied that they had a plane in the area but did later confirm it was their vehicle after the resident had identified the aircraft using a tracking app.

Whitfield parish councillor Geoff Paxton, who has 40 years of experience at airports and was also on the call, said the occurrence was “very rare” in modern planes.

“We used to have problems with blue ice [frozen human waste and disinfectant] on arrivals but that was because those toilets used to leak”. Paxton said he believed that, as there is less pressure below 6,000 ft, that “it could well be that something came out of the vent at low altitude.”

We know that having a bird poo on you is supposed to be good luck but this is taking things too far.

Indy100 has contacted the Civil Aviation Authority for comment.

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