26% Of Americans Haven’t Had Sex In The Last 12 Months
The Independent

A parent has been left mortified after their eight-year-old daughter told their teacher about the “squeaking” noises she heard from her parent's bedroom.

The child told the teacher that due to the noise, she figured there must a mouse infestation in their home.

The teacher told the parent when they collected the child from school, leaving them red-faced.

Taking to Reddit’s Today I F***ed up forum, the parent said that by virtue of having a child, it can be difficult to find time for intimacy unless it’s the middle of the night.

When their daughter was distracted by a movie a few nights ago however, the parents sloped off to their bedroom and locked the door.

Sign up to our new free Indy100 weekly newsletter

They thought all was fine, until their daughter’s teacher pulled one of them aside.

The teacher said: “[Your daughter] has been telling all of her classmates that you have a mouse problem in your house.

“She said she went looking for you and your wife the other night and your bedroom door was locked so she couldn’t get in, but she heard a lot of squeaking noises through the door.

“She said we must have a lot of mice in there”.

Yikes.

They concluded the post: “I’m sure the horrified look on my face was hilarious at the time but it was a bit of a surprise. I thought we had gotten away with it.”

Other commenters shared similar stories of how they were caught out when they thought they were being discreet.

One mom said that when their son was around 11, she and her husband attempted to enjoy each other’s company late at night. Although they tried to be quiet, their son woke up and burst into their room “ready to fight”, “screaming ‘don’t hurt my mom’”.

She explained: “He thought I was crying and that dad had hit me cause the bed was noisy. We felt so bad. Poor thing was terrified. His dad has never and would never hurt me so I’m not sure why he thought he had hit me. I know the poor kid was traumatized, though at 16 now he seems pretty well adjusted.”

Another said when her daughter was four, she told her mom she heard her arguing with her dad earlier this morning. The mother said they didn’t argue, but the child insisted: “You were. You said ‘Oh God’ and then he said ‘Oh God’. You were arguing about God.” Red-faced, the mother replied: “Oh! Yes, you’re right. We’ll try to be quieter next time we’re arguing.”

A different user wrote: “I feel your pain. My son once knocked on our door and asked, ‘can I come in when you guys are done exercising?’”

“Just be glad you locked the door,” one commenter quipped.

Another commenter had the hilarious suggestion that they should go all-in and get some pet mice and keep them in their room so they have a good excuse if there are any future noise complaints.

Have your say in our news democracy. Click the upvote icon at the top of the page to help raise this article through the indy100 rankings.

Please log in or register to upvote this article
The Conversation (0)