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Mimi Launder
Dec 23, 2017

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iStock / monkeybusinessimages
After thousands of years of human existence, you might think we know all there is to know about the life of girls.
But it turns out we've only just scratched the surface, as Roberto Carlos discovered when he lived with all girls for a week.
Keen to share his knowledge - and not suffer alone - Carlos has taken to Twitter to share his findings with the world.
The thread even had a start time so everyone could prepare for the truths to follow.
A thread about what I learned whilst living with girls for one week is going live at 10pm— Roberto Carlos (@Roberto Carlos) 1513547023
Girls can get pretty loud.
1) When girls get in from a night out, literally anything is the funniest thing that has ever happened. “OMG HAHAHAAHAH I JUST ATE A CARROT”— Roberto Carlos (@Roberto Carlos) 1513547983
2) When girls are trying to be quiet they make most of their noise with the “SSSHHHHHHHHHHH”— Roberto Carlos (@Roberto Carlos) 1513548000
They really look after each other. Or at least one of them does.
3) There is one designated mum in every group. She takes everyones make up off, provides water and makes sure everyone is home.— Roberto Carlos (@Roberto Carlos) 1513548024
And they can also be pretty gross... yet organised?
4) I went for a shower and there was organized clumps of hair on the wall?????— Roberto Carlos (@Roberto Carlos) 1513548049
5) They bring a staggering amount of toiletries. I am speaking masses and masses. Shelves, bags and even the floor… https://t.co/LcW9W5Z7Mr— Roberto Carlos (@Roberto Carlos) 1513548071
Some pretty weird stuff goes down.
6) So boys, I found out girls have actual tape that goes on their boobs when they wear a low cut top to make the sh… https://t.co/DeohngfYeJ— Roberto Carlos (@Roberto Carlos) 1513548090
7) Also, there were these weird flower shaped things on the table. Found out these things are actually stuck on gir… https://t.co/jbStZfzFw0— Roberto Carlos (@Roberto Carlos) 1513548117
8) There are things called chicken fillets and they aren’t the ones you eat— Roberto Carlos (@Roberto Carlos) 1513548132
9) From 5pm onwards I was refused entry to the toilet area as it was reserved until 11pm for showering and about 3… https://t.co/63GS6WhIJD— Roberto Carlos (@Roberto Carlos) 1513548150
There's no such thing as personal ownership.
10) Girls all share clothes like one big free for all?? “you seen my nice black top?” “oh yeh babe got it on atm”— Roberto Carlos (@Roberto Carlos) 1513548167
Or too much food.
11) The night out doesn’t end when they get in. oh no. Whilst I was trying to sleep at 5am there was an extended ba… https://t.co/sNncHwFaoD— Roberto Carlos (@Roberto Carlos) 1513548182
12) These girls just got so hungry when they came back it was mad. Mayo pasta? Yes please babe x— Roberto Carlos (@Roberto Carlos) 1513548197
They live life to strict rules.
13) Anything I said was automatically wrong because I had a penis so I just learned to accept my fate.— Roberto Carlos (@Roberto Carlos) 1513548210
14) Girls spoon each other. A lot.— Roberto Carlos (@Roberto Carlos) 1513548225
No boy they text is safe.
15) Girls literally rip apart every text a guy sends them. If you are thinking you are a lad that this hasn’t happe… https://t.co/WxTmxfNlcX— Roberto Carlos (@Roberto Carlos) 1513548243
Hygiene and time-keeping are taken very seriously.
16) Girls sniff their armpits to see if they smell. “nah not too bad”— Roberto Carlos (@Roberto Carlos) 1513548258
18) By the end of the week my deodorant was empty because “boys deodorant smells better”— Roberto Carlos (@Roberto Carlos) 1513548285
Being good with eyeliner is a rare gift that should be shared.
19) One girl in the group is usually the designated ‘winged eyeliner applicator’. The others seem useless.— Roberto Carlos (@Roberto Carlos) 1513548304
Girls have a lot to think about.
20) If you miss taking your pill two consecutive days in a row you have fucked up your cycle. I became the pill reminder.— Roberto Carlos (@Roberto Carlos) 1513548321
21) ALWAYS REMEMBER TO PUT PRIMER ON BEFORE YOU START YOUR MAKE UP.— Roberto Carlos (@Roberto Carlos) 1513548339
22) “omg im so bloated I can’t wear this” was a phrase heard hourly during the evening getting ready process.— Roberto Carlos (@Roberto Carlos) 1513548353
23) Outfit changes will happen boys. Do yourself a favour and go to sleep. Think she is finally done because she is on her third outfit? Ha.— Roberto Carlos (@Roberto Carlos) 1513548374
24) “should I wear pants in this?”— Roberto Carlos (@Roberto Carlos) 1513548388
25) girls don’t pack until 30mins before they need to leave because they need half their suitcase every minute.— Roberto Carlos (@Roberto Carlos) 1513548402
26) Girls have two make up bags. One bag with all the make up that they actually use, and one that has absolutely n… https://t.co/iLLRfJUOJg— Roberto Carlos (@Roberto Carlos) 1513548433
Suspicion runs deep.
27) I tried to give compliments but I was told to fuck off as apparently I was being sarcastic. “you look really ni… https://t.co/HHWn0fkvJh— Roberto Carlos (@Roberto Carlos) 1513548447
Hair - and everything to do with it - is an untameable monster.
28) Hairgrips everywhere you look. Floor? Hairgrips. Bed? Hairgrips? Shower? Hairgrips.— Roberto Carlos (@Roberto Carlos) 1513548463
29) There will be hair. Everywhere.— Roberto Carlos (@Roberto Carlos) 1513548480
Sleep is almost as important as food.
30) Wake girls up in the morning at your own peril. "Robbie turn your alarms off ffs"— Roberto Carlos (@Roberto Carlos) 1513548506
Girls have a unique sense of humour.
31) Right so these girls thought it was fuckin hilarious to get all the hair out of their hairbrush and put it on m… https://t.co/FYP1b3hlnr— Roberto Carlos (@Roberto Carlos) 1513617803
32) "robbie I promise this won't hurt" https://t.co/wwixa4PBpo— Roberto Carlos (@Roberto Carlos) 1513617856
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