
Most of the time, most people appear to be quite content not knowing - or, in some cases, even caring - where Boris Johnson is.
But today saw that sacred British tradition flipped on its head when the foreign secretary, was given permission to miss a crunch vote on a third runway at Heathrow Airport, but didn't seem to be anywhere else either.
Theresa May helpfully explained last week that Johnson, who is opposed to expansion and once said he would lie down in front of bulldozers to prevent construction, would be busy being "the living embodiment of global Britain" instead. Not being a geographical location though, that didn't help us much. Though we knew he would be abroad, we didn't know where.
After hours of intense speculation, the wait to discover the whereabouts of Johnson is finally over: for the few readers who weren't feverishly tracking the story, it turns out he is in Afghanistan discussing extremism, the upcoming Afghan elections and human trafficking, according to the country's minister of foreign affairs, which seems fair enough.
But, onto more important business: we may have recovered our foreign secretary already, but it will take far longer to forget (or recover) the state of British Twitter on the day of his disappearance.
The question was everywhere.
There were some interesting theories.
Does anyone know where Boris actually is? https://t.co/wS5KuAW6Cj— Adam Langleben (@Adam Langleben) 1529929077
Boris Johnson found. #bbcdp https://t.co/A6Tgq5HPUL— Summit (@Summit) 1529927942
People started having flashbacks to other great political moments. Remember Priti Patel and her plane?
*booming voice* From the makers of 'Priti Patel on a plane', the sequel: 'Where in the world is Boris Johnson?'— Aubrey Allegretti (@Aubrey Allegretti) 1529916938
Even largely unimpressed Tory MPs got involved.
Others saw the irony.
Only Boris Johnson could fly around the world to protest against airport expansion.— Henry Mance (@Henry Mance) 1529911106
And picked up on his apparent hypocrisy.
Boris Johnson: "I’ll lie down in front of the bulldozers to stop Heathrow expansion” *flies out of the country* “I… https://t.co/dQUSPcKcZZ— David Schneider (@David Schneider) 1529917917