Woman gives bridesmaids ‘transparency letters’ so they know what they’re in for

Sinead Butler
Wednesday 09 June 2021 14:21
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TikToker Lisa shows viewers the letter she gave her bridesmaids

(TikTok/lisalovesrandom)

We all know the duties of a bridesmaid can be extremely stressful, after all, you want the bride to have the best day ever.

However, it can cost bridesmaids a lot of time and money to make this happen, and sometimes people don’t realise this when agreeing to the commitment.

One woman on TikTok has shared how gave “transparency letters” to her friends about what they can expect from being her bridesmaid.

You can watch the full video here.

TikToker Lisa replied to a previous video where a woman writes, “When you agree to be a bridesmaid without realising it’ll cost three whole paychecks and every second of your paid time off for the year.”

In her response, Lisa begins: “I’m really glad someone pointed this out, I am going to share a tip that I used to be more transparent with my bridal party.”

(TikTok/lisalovesrandom)

When asking her friends to be bridesmaids, Lisa wanted to make sure that her friends knew what they were signing up for before so to prevent any miscommunication further down the line.

The bride admitted she felt “very insecure” giving her friends letters on what she expected from her bridal party but was ultimately “glad” that she did.

“I just put it in this cute little envelope and included it as part of the bridesmaids proposal box,” as she shows off the letter and then a polka-dot envelope.

“In that letter, I outlined time commitments, so I told them if they lived over an hour away, they didn’t have to worry about making it to the bridal shower or to go wedding dress shopping with me, it was fine.

Lisa added: “I also specified money commitments, so I told them I would pay for their hair and and makeup, but that they would be responsible for the cost of the bridesmaid dress - although they had freedom over what style they wanted, I just asked for a specific colour.”

In a follow-up video, Lisa revealed the contents of her letter after a commenter asked what she wrote to her friends.

She said in the video caption: “Your #transparencyletter may look different, & that’s okay. We envision different things.”

(TikTok/lisalovesrandom)

More importantly, Lisa emphasised in her letter that her friends were free to turn down her offer of being a bridesmaid if they felt that they couldn’t commit to her requirements.

She also assured them that turning down the role wouldn’t affect their friendship.

“I told them that they could say no to being a bridesmaid, that we would still be friends and they could still keep all the gifts in the bridesmaid proposal box,” she said.

“One of them said no and we’re still good friends.”

Lisa’s TikTok has since gone viral with 3.5m views, and over 671,000 likes on the app.

It just goes to show how problems can easily be avoided with some clear communication.

Take note, future brides.

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