Someone has added fake covers to David Cameron's book and it's grade-A trolling
Getty/Twitter

Somewhere in central London there is an actual living genius that has taken trolling David Cameron to whole new heights.

The anonymous mastermind printed out an alternative cover for the former prime minister's book, which included such gems as:

David lives in a weird hut on wheels in the Cotswolds. He keeps wasps and brews his own vinegar.

In this reimagined literary world, Cameron's book won the endorsement of Donald Trump, in a statement so Trump-y that you'd be forgive for not immediately noticing it wasn't real.

A very great book. So great. No, it’s a great book. All the words. All the pages.

Olympic athlete Linford Christie had this to say:

Horrifying and arousing in equal measure

Wondering what the book is actually about? Worry not, we have a synopsis:

Women wanted him. Men wanted to be him. Animals feared him. He had the world at his feet, yet he threw it all away over a bitter rivalry that began at the urinals of Eton forty years ago.

This isn’t so much a book as a blueprint of how to completely destroy a country - written by a tired man with [sic] face like a satellite dish made entirely of ham.

Pictures of the book cover were posted on Twitter yesterday and it already seems to be more popular than the authentic version.

The back cover makes some excellent claims:

A late developer, with an overactive bladder and tiny hands, teachers were quick to write David off. However his chippy spirit and outrageously bawdy limericks soon earned him favour with the in-crowd at Eton.

He famously started his own nickname “DCW” (which stands for Davidoff Cool Water) and would do almost anything to impress.

To secure his place in the Bullingdon club, DCW put on a one-man show at the Oxford Playhouse where he set fire to a badger on stage and smeared the warm ashes into his soft, naked body - singing a haunting high-pitched version of ‘Guide Me O Thou Great Redeemer’. There wasn’t a dry seat in the house and the performance secured his position among the business elites in the world.

In 2015 David became the first openly gluten intolerant prime minister of Great Britain and Northern Ireland. Within hours of moving into number 10, he’d installed a small urinal and a fax machine into all thirty-eight rooms to “finally get things pumping on Downing Street.”

Some bits were pretty real though.

Six years later he was sacked for dividing Britain into two squabbling factions. Neither side willing to listen to the other and each considering themselves to be the only people that really understand what’s going on.

According to Kiss FM, the book is:

Mesmerising and incoherent: Like Anusol for the mind.

The front cover has also been rewritten for Cameron:

The referendum on Britain’s membership of the European Union has been one of the most controversial political events of modern times. But why did it happen? What lay behind the decision? Find out today by buying this book - at a very reasonable price.

Enough time has now passed for everybody to forgive David for what he did. Let’s not remember him for the one terrible thing he did but for all the hundreds of lovely things he did.

For example:

He’s a kind man really. A funny man. A family man. A man of the people. And this book is a chance to show that he really did try his best.

He’s only human. We all make mistakes. David should really be remembered as the best prime minister we ever had.

Obviously everyone is obsessed with this new version.

And others pointed out it's not the first alternative version of the book out there.

Keep reading...Show less
Please log in or register to upvote this article
The Conversation (0)