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Jessica Brown
Mar 02, 2017

Picture:
Girlie Glue / Facebook
Another day, another stupid invention.
First there was vagina glue. Now, it’s a glue that allows parents to stick objects to their baby’s heads.
Yes, really.
Girlie Glue is the answer for misguided parents everywhere who feel the need to put their baby's gender in plain view.
On its website, Girlie Glue states:
Girlie Glue is an all-nautral accessory glue – no hair necessary! Fancy possibilities are endless with a dab of Girlie Glue.
It’s ‘made of Agave nectar and other all-natural ingredients. It’s safe, 100% honey-free and washes away easily with water.
It promises to ‘hold her accessories in place all day long’ - and parents can also buy accessories to go alongside the glue, in the form of bows, hearts and flower shapes.
Its tagline? "It’s never too early to be girlie." At least they've made the effort to rhyme.
Its CEO, Katie Hydrick, said she had the idea when she tried to put hair clips in her baby’s head and realised she had no hair. The website states:
Frustrated with no easy fix, she went to the kitchen and whipped up a batch of what would become Girlie Glue as we know it. She began using her creation to stick bows on her babies. People constantly stopped her, asking where they could get some. The rest is history.
Presumably pre-women's suffrage history.
People are, of course, a bit confused:
@cctheatreco @PinkstinksUK this is horrifying— Grace Bonney (@Grace Bonney) 1488386987
'It's never too early to be girlie' & stick stuff to your baby's head & ears with GLUE oh it's only #girlieglue To… https://t.co/vQcQM7VAbn— Claire Moore (@Claire Moore) 1488355912
I mean, u could just not glue shit to your baby's head. We could just keep on never doing that. Never gluing shit… https://t.co/R80Jds9rjl— Ijeoma Oluo (@Ijeoma Oluo) 1488467721
@cctheatreco Use it for horns, sets of large googly eyes, carpet samples... @Hivemeitner— Trevor S. Valle (@Trevor S. Valle) 1488360927
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