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Evan Bartlett
1482484500

Donald Trump might not have enough time in his busy schedule to attend highly important national security briefings, but he sure finds some to send bad tweets.
The latest in this inglorious series came when the president-elect took to Twitter on Thursday night to address rumours about the utter lack of celebrities who want to attend or perform at his inauguration party next month.
While the likes of Elton John, Celine Dion, Beyonce and Ice T were all rumoured to be in the running, none have been confirmed.
So bad is the dearth of willing A-listers (and B- and C-listers), there was even a story flying around that universally unpopular Nickelback were the only band he could get to play - unfortunately for Trump, even that turned out to be fake. But, hey, at least there will be a Mormon choir and a 16-year-old from reality TV.
Nevertheless, Trump claims A-listers are all wanting "tixs".
"Tixs":
"tixs," for those not "in the know," is short for "ticketses." https://t.co/OdMvCBdMwR— Mark Harris (@Mark Harris) 1482468128
People have to keep reminding themselves that, yes, this man really has just been elected to the most powerful office on Earth:
Hard to process that the next president is both a conscienceless threat to the republic and also a heartbreakingly… https://t.co/TnnhZVxgN0— David Frum (@David Frum) 1482459764
Yep:
While some find this quite worrying:
Isn't it great to wake up each morning to another profound message from the soon to be POTUS ? https://t.co/aBnlg9osGr— Annette Dittert (@Annette Dittert) 1482478898
They can at least take solace in the fact that Trump is a source of relentless fun:
This is the type of shit you post online after nobody RSVPs to your Facebook invite. https://t.co/bpGw7kdzkU— Mike Drucker (@Mike Drucker) 1482463353
He is a man baby:
All the cool kids were like, totally BEGGING to come to my birthday but I was like "No thanks, I only want my cousi… https://t.co/TG5UOjuC62— carina adly mackenzie (@carina adly mackenzie) 1482469374
The most precious snowflake of them all:
The awkward moment when the President y'all voted for is the most sensitive snowflake of all https://t.co/qNpDeuZYAw— Southern Homo (@Southern Homo) 1482465109
@realDonaldTrump what's it like being the only president to have the raging insecurity of a tween in the awkward p… https://t.co/nXpxlfA1GB— Adam Mordecai (@Adam Mordecai) 1482461345
The child president:
@realDonaldTrump the Child President— Mike Denison (@Mike Denison) 1482458614
Hosting an inauguration that is increasingly starting to resemble a pre-teen's birthday party:
"I didn't want those stupid-heads at my party ANYWAY! They're all stupid and they smell like poop!" https://t.co/UHSMOUe2Np— Charles #GetCovered-ba 🩺 (@Charles #GetCovered-ba 🩺) 1482458596
A pre-teen with no friends:
@realDonaldTrump No need to lie. It's okay no one wants to come to your party. We've all been there. I mean, not those of us with friends.— Jon Bershad (@Jon Bershad) 1482458545
@realDonaldTrump Who needs friends? We'll have a special family birthday party and the staff will stay and play games with you.— pourmecoffee (@pourmecoffee) 1482458719
Maybe he just needs a reality check:
.@realDonaldTrump You and I both know that no real celebrity would be caught dead cheering you on, but you need to be okay with that, angel.— Bess Kalb (@Bess Kalb) 1482459918
Sorry, Donny:
.@realDonaldTrump Literally nobody wants tix to the inauguration— Marlow Stern (@Marlow Stern) 1482458595
Although this would be cool:
@realDonaldTrump I hope David Blaine performs and makes you disappear— Tony Posnanski (@Tony Posnanski) 1482458566
More: An exclusive extract of a new book on why Donald Trump ‘deserves trust, respect and admiration’
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