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Narjas Zatat
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The #MeToo movement has popped the lid off sexual assault experiences, and droves of women across the world continue to share their trauma in an effort to educate, and to hold their abusers accountable.
In the wake of this, women have been using social media to demonstrate to heterosexual men the tiring and often detailed plans and lies they have in place in preparation for possibly being sexually assaulted.
Just last week, a woman called Sara on Twitter revealed that a man had made her feel like she was in danger after he came around with the intention of buying a dryer she was selling, only to spew sexually explicit things to her – in her own home.
Now, a string of tweets from writer Jill Gutowitz have gone viral after she explained the lies she has to tell overly interested taxi drivers when she gets picked up at night.
She begins the thread: “I’ve seen tweets going around about how normal situations for men can be dangerous for women. Here’s another: Male Uber/Lyft drivers OFTEN ask me, and ONLY at night when I’m alone, after we’re already en route, 'So where are we headed?' I’m careful not to say 'home'.”
Gutowitz goes on to explain that she lies to male taxi drivers and tells them she’s going to a boyfriend’s house – despite being gay – in order to feel safe.
They already have the address, so it's not a real inquiry—they want to know what this destination is to me. If I re… https://t.co/KqAgacVO6g— Jill Gutowitz (@Jill Gutowitz) 1539038158
I know they want me to say it's my place. One time, I did, and he asked if I lived alone, in which case I texted a… https://t.co/p8IiZrUQbZ— Jill Gutowitz (@Jill Gutowitz) 1539038212
Most times—and this has happened to me at least 4 times (!!!) this year—I reply "My boyfriend's house." It's the on… https://t.co/JC0K8zZsXA— Jill Gutowitz (@Jill Gutowitz) 1539038266
I will never be going to a "boyfriend's" house. For as long as ride-sharing exists as is, I will have to lie about… https://t.co/SMW9XNJWpd— Jill Gutowitz (@Jill Gutowitz) 1539038364
Ride-sharing is a nightmare for queer people for other reasons—the amount of times a male driver has asked if I hav… https://t.co/esVrKcISXo— Jill Gutowitz (@Jill Gutowitz) 1539038450
Any time I Uber/Lyft home at night and it's a male driver, I risk being assaulted, or worse. Don't ever forget that… https://t.co/Y2gYy5LjaW— Jill Gutowitz (@Jill Gutowitz) 1539038567
Also crazy that women are already replying to this telling me what they say when they're asked "where are we headed… https://t.co/rlHB8e5dP8— Jill Gutowitz (@Jill Gutowitz) 1539038876
It wasn’t long before women chimed in on the post with their own coping mechanisms to keep safe, and it’s pretty heart-breaking.
One woman wrote: “Got an uber home from uni and the driver was asking me if I’ve ever had sex and saying I could have it with him because I’m disabled and was in pain [sic] told me he’d give me a massage and then I could give him one with a happy ending and then gave me his phone to put my number in.”
@jillboard Only when travelling alone, have I had male Uber drivers asking me if that was my home, if I live alone,… https://t.co/gfGZgTFHZS— Laura (@Laura) 1539089612
Others shared their uncomfortable experiences with male taxi drivers.
@jillboard one time i got an uber home n the guy asked if i had a boyfriend and i said no and he spent the rest of… https://t.co/cZNxZBsz34— clare (@clare) 1539073283
@jillboard In addition to the MANY “My BF’s place” lies: One outta nowhere told me he was trying to masturbate less… https://t.co/nREKFxWobm— Cerra (@Cerra) 1539089514
However the silver lining in the viral post is that male allies were out in full force.
@jillboard I know this is obvious, but: while I'm sure many men get this, I'm positive the majority do not. Keep th… https://t.co/Zc8TzErfPL— Frankp (@Frankp) 1539069305
@caitlinsays_ @jillboard @not_too_shabbie It is one other thing that a woman has a different perspective on, and it… https://t.co/C0kiENgHWa— It's Me, Vinay. (@It's Me, Vinay.) 1539088326
@jillboard When I used to regularly give rides via Lyft, my first question after a brief greeting was always: “Woul… https://t.co/IHk1VI1t0q— 🇺🇸💙💜💗 мαиαχ™ 💗💜💙🇺🇸 (@🇺🇸💙💜💗 мαиαχ™ 💗💜💙🇺🇸) 1539082097
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