Today in things we never would have dreamed of putting on our pandemic bingo cards: Shakira has accused a pack of wild boars of attacking and robbing her whilst on a walk in Barcelona.

The “Hips Don’t Lie” singer took to her Instagram stories to share the bizarre story, holding the bag the now-recovered bag the boars attempted to seize up for the camera. “Look at how two wild boar, which attacked me in the park, have left my bag,” she said.

“They were taking my bag to the woods with my mobile phone in it,” the Lebanese-Colombian pop-star recalled. “They’ve destroyed everything.” Shakira then turned to her son Milan and told him to “tell the truth. Say how your mommy stop up to the wild boar.”

It may sound funny, since it’s so absurd, but attacks by wild boars are no laughing matter. Wild boars usually weigh around 200 pounds — about 15 stone — and run up to 30 miles (or 48 kilometer) per hour, according to Texas A&M Agriculture. They can also “jump over fences less than 3ft high and have ‘climbed’ out of pig traps with walls 5 to 6ft high.”

So, in short: Don’t mess with boars, and if you see one, run, and then try to climb up a tree. Click here for more tips on how to survive a boar attack.

But, of course, the genuine danger Shakira was in hasn’t stop the internet from going wild (hog) with memes.

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We’re glad to hear Shakira and her son are okay.

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