The 19 most ridiculous questions that patients have asked doctors

A list of inappropriate demands made of GPs has been published on the Resilient GP website, which supports doctors coping with heavy workloads.

Here are the highlights:


Is my nipple too hairy?


Is there a pill so I can have a baby boy?


I have ugly feet.


Do you have something to make my nails stronger & hair shinier before my holiday tomorrow?


Doctor, please tell my son to study harder so he can get into Eton.

(The child was six.)


My skin is too soft.


I get sore feet when I dance in high heels.


I'm addicted to crisps.


I have blisters on my hands since I started in the rowing club.


My lodger is annoying me... he's spending too much time in his room.


Can I have a sick note for six months because I am nearly at retirement age?


Please can you fill out my driving licence application; I'm not sure how to.


Doctor, please can you write to my daughter's school to say I'm finding the school run tiring and can they arrange transport to and from my house?


I've just been on holiday with my mistress... work want to know where I've been. I'd like a sick note to cover me.


I burnt the top of my mouth on pizza five days ago...


I am allergic to cats. I am getting a cat. Can I get a vaccination?


I'm allergic to avocados, if I eat eight I'm sick.


I'm really worried my daughter has a splinter... can you get it out? We haven't tried by the way, because we were so worried.


I don't know why I'm here doctor, my wife made the appointment.

Well shall we bring your wife in or telephone her perhaps?

We can't. She's in Portugal.

Dr John Cosgrove, a GP from Birmingham, said there was a serious point behind the list.

"It's long been known that a lot of what GPs see is not necessarily amenable to medical treatment in the strict sense of the word. We're quite happy to help people. But we're just asking the question – is that the best use of us as a limited resource? With cuts in other services, we're seen as a quick fix and we get very little in the way of extra support."

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