Pollster Lord Ashcroft doesn't just do hard numbers. He has previously asked focus groups what drink, supermarket and even holiday destination politicians are (David Cameron being Monaco).
Now he has summed up that research in a presentation looking at the state of play ahead of May's general election.
The polls themselves show the rise of the SNP could dramatically alter the political landscape. The nationalists could take 56 of the 59 constituencies in Scotland, including Gordon Brown's.
But beyond ballot box intentions, Ashcroft has analysed how voters perceive politicians. Nick Clegg is seen as Fred from Scooby-Doo, a Smart car, a bottle of Babycham, and a Chihuahua in a handbag. Of all the actors in the world, Tom Cruise would play him in a film of his life.
David Cameron, meanwhile is a fox, a Vesper Martini, a Mercedes, Dick Dastardly - and Hugh Grant would play him.
Farage meanwhile, is Aldi and voters are unsure whether he most resembles Cruella DeVille or Reg Smythe's Andy Capp.
Finally Ed Miliband is Looney Tunes's Elmer Fudd, and voters imagine he holidays at the Moon ("because he seems to be in a world of his own"). Mr Bean would play him in the film of his life, and he is "a drink like a crème de menthe that nobody would order".