“I built a spreadsheet, explained it to her, and wanted to handle things like adults. She acted like she was nodding off, struggling to stay away, she looked like a high school kid stuck in the most boring class in the school.
“When I was done, I didn’t expect a fight, I thought it was fair. She on the other hand, doesn’t view this as a budget that benefits us both, she views this as I’m dominating her and I’m constricting her.”
Responding to his post, some people thought he was in the wrong.
“Everyone needs a budget, but this is something that should have been hammered out before you got married. There’s a reason that money is a leading cause of divorce,” one said.
A second said: “I don’t know that your handling it quite right.
“I’d get some separate bank accounts and have the joint one for bills and things (vacation fund, retirement… whatever) you each contribute to in whatever pre-agreed amount you’ve discussed.”
But others supported him:
One said: “If you’re married, you’re in a partnership. A partner doesn’t go out and spend all of the money of the partnership on nonessentials, especially if the other partner is funding things.”
And another said: “That’s what my wife and I kinda do. We have our main checking that our pay gets deposited into and where our bills are paid from. We also have our own checking accounts where we transfer an “allowance” of the same amount to each one for judgement-free personal spending.”