Mum worries her son's phallic surname will make him a target for bullies

A mother has expressed concern that her son's phallic surname will cause him issues as he is already being targeted by bullies at school.

The 31-year-old mother who shares her nine-year-old son with her ex-husband, 35, posted her dilemma to the Reddit where she explained how her son shares the same surname as her ex which is Cox... except spelled like C***s. "It's an old English spelling, apparently," she said.

After the pair divorced when their son was 18 months old, her ex declined the offer of "a reasonable visitation schedule," because he said he "gets bored with him," and she recalled how he would often ask her to pick their son up early when he had him so he could hang out with his friends.

Then her ex moved out of state - around a 10-hour car journey - and would visit his son 2-3 times per year but would most of the time ended up returning their son back earlier than planned, she said.

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The mum explained how she is now remarried and took her wife's last name, but now her son is at an age "where he's starting to get confused why he doesn't have the same last name as my wife and I."

She shared how they plan on having a baby who will also take the same her wife's surname, and then explained how her son's surname has caused some problems.

"With my son's last name being so phallic, he's been targeted by bullies at school ALREADY, even though he's only 9 years old. We've had issues with systems bouncing back the name as a swear word, too."

The mum claims her son wants to change his phallic surname but his father says he should "learn to wear it like a badge of pride"iStockphoto by Getty Images

Hoping to resolve the problem, the mother decided to ask her ex if she could change her son's last name.

"I approached my ex to ask if he'd be willing to let us change my son's last name to ours, due to the above reasons," she wrote.

However, things were not so straightforward as the father was offended by this request.

"He declined, stating that 'he shouldn't have to deal with this disrespect' and 'it's his right as a man to have offspring with his last name'.

"When I asked him, 'Okay, but what about the bullying?' his response was, 'He should learn to wear it like a badge of pride and you're damaging him by telling him it's okay to have a different name.'

"He's always been extremely prideful, bordering on narcissistic, but I need to do what's best for my son. He keeps swearing up and down that this will be the downfall of their relationship, and it'll be my fault."

Since sharing her predicament, plenty of people have showed their support for the woman.

One person wrote: "If you can legally change your son's name without the father's input/permission, do it."

"'Dad' isn’t a dad at this point, he’s a DNA donor. Ask your son what HE wants, and do that. Ex sounds like he’s looking for an excuse to permanently bail on your son. He sounds fairly worthless, so let him," another person said.

Someone else added: "For someone who doesn’t bother to play any active part in his son’s life, your ex has a lot to say regarding this.

"You’ve done the polite thing, which is ask. If you can legally change it without his input, go ahead!"

"If you've asked your child's opinion and they want it, and you are legally allowed to without the father's permission," a fourth person commented.

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