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Louis Dor
Jul 07, 2015
Business secretary Sajid Javid, earmarked as a potential successor to David Cameron, has attempted to tell a joke about the EU. Emphasis on attempted.
Speaking at the Conservative Way Forward launch party, Javid jested ('jested') about the difficulties of overseeing all UK trade.
As business secretary, I take great overall responsibility for negotiations concerning the single market.
Across my desk the other day I got a brief saying that the EU wants to regulate the number of condoms you have in a packet.
What going on at the moment is that the Swedes are saying there must be five. They want one for Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday and Friday.
The French are saying 'Non! We want seven! We want one for Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday and one for Saturday and Sunday.'
The Italians? They want nine, one for each weekday and two for Saturday and two for Sunday.
But you’ll be pleased to know that Britain has put its foot down. We want 12.
January, February, March, April, [etc.].
We will not be pushed around.
If there are any journalists around that was a joke by the way, it’s not going to happen. It’s not a part of the EU renegotiation platform.
Oh! So it’s not serious? It’s just a crude joke about international sexual stereotypes? That’s all good then. Crack on, Mr Javid.
To see the joke performed by the stand-up himself, who oversees trade with Europe, see the video below:
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