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Waiters reveal the most f**ked up things they've overheard

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SHUTTERSTOCK / BONDVIT

We're all guilty of eavesdropping when nearby conversations get interesting. But there are some people work in a setting where there's always something interesting to overhear.

The service industry is a prime example of that, and waiters took to reddit to reveal all.

There were a few extreme awkward confessions

Had a guy confess to banging his SO's sister when I brought their drinks to them. It was an anniversary. I guess he thought it would be the least likely place for her to cause a scene. She caused a scene.

- captaincous

The CEO of a rather well known company was discussing (proudly) that they had fired a man who was a year or two off retirement so they could employ his recently graduated daughter. Tipped like shit too

- i_will_bang_you

A few weird and deeply inappropriate declarations

I am a server at a small hall that runs a restaurant/bar out of the basement in a small, rural community. One night, after almost all of the patrons had left, an old man shuffles up to the serving area, looks left and right, leans in and says, “All old people have AIDS,” He pauses, then says “Hearing aids, bandaids, and Roll-aids!”. He cackles, then shuffles away.

- Muskellunge120

There were some funny reveals

When I was a waiter, people often pretended that I wasn't there. The stories they told were crazy and personal. One woman at a table of 6 lunching ladies told the story of how her husband was recently prescribed viagra. “He took it like a vitamin - 1 pill every morning. He kept having erections at work and didn't understand why.”

-ninja_at_law

Worked as a bartender for a few months, I remember two middle-aged women having a hushed conversation and then one of them loudly asking “Wait, you've NEVER had your salad tossed?!”

-poopybuttpenis

Some ridiculously shocking stories...

I was delivering food to a large table that looked like they were on a family reunion vacation when I overheard a grandpa asking one of the younger (12 or 13?) grandchildren if he they had fun that day. The kid responded with “F*ck you grandpa I can't wait until you die.”. I almost dropped all the plates in shock.

-Alternate_Ending74

Disturbing tales

In a Witherspoons and there was a slight lull in the Friday night noise and a buddy and I overheard a girl say “Well technically he isn't my brother so I shagged him” to which her friend replied “But you have the same Dad”.

-ElPapaDiablo

My girlfriend waits tables. One time a creepy man said to her “when I have sex with my wife, I think of you instead.”

The wife sitting at the table didn't seem bothered by this fact.

I also bought my girlfriend pepper spray and a tazer soon after.

-coach_whackbat

Middle aged couple on what seemed like an early-ish date.

Hand them the machine to pay at the end. She takes it. The machine gives her the option to tap her card or insert it.

She puts on a voice, and looks at him:

"Oh, wow. It's asking me if I want to tap or insert. Should I... tap? Or... insert?"

He smiles, and I'm just standing there. I can't even pretend not to be paying attention, I'm a foot away and was just talking to them.

"I guess I'll just tap. But I really would rather insert."

She finally hands the machine back to me. It takes about 3 weeks to print out the damn receipt, and I leave with a "thanksforcominginhaveagreatnightyeahthanksbye".

- ElCaz

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