This is what it means to be demisexual

In the past couple of years, our understanding of sexuality has widened to encompass more than simply ‘heterosexual’ and LGBT.

Washington Post writer Meryl Williams wrote a piece about what being a ‘demisexual’ means and how she discovered her own sexuality:

Years ago, I would feel guilty for frustrating the people I was dating. I didn’t want to feel as if I needed to explain to people why I wasn’t ready to be intimate… I generally put intellect and sense of humour over how “attractive” someone is. If a guy doesn’t say anything offensive and makes me laugh on a first date, I’ll probably go on a second. Still, I know that a person’s positive attributes don’t necessarily guarantee that a physical attraction will follow. I just have to be patient and see what happens.

According to Demisexuality.org - a bastion of articles, books and forums for demisexuals - their partners, friends and families:

Demisexuality is a state in which one feels sexual attraction only after forming an emotional connection.

In other words, demisexuals do not feel sexual attraction towards a member of the opposite (or same) sex without first forming a strong emotional bond with their partner of interest.

And while sexual orientation and sexual preference differs person-to-person, there are unique challenges associated with demisexuality.

The prevalence of 'hook up culture' and society’s encouragement to get physically intimate early on in a relationship meant that Williams, and probably other people identifying with the sexuality, mistook their lack of interest in sex as a sign of asexuality.

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