This woman's texts show the difference between a healthy and a controlling relationship

iStock / LittleBee80

When you're in the midst of a toxic relationship, it can be hard to recognise harmful behaviour.

But nothing exposes it quite so effectively as contrasting it to a healthy, love relationship - and this Twitter user did just that, showing how jealousy and possessive behaviour is not the only way.

The texts show similar conversations going very different ways.

Hearing that his partner is out with friends, the first man reacts passive aggressively, clearly driven by jealousy.

But the second conversations shows a calm, considered response, not threatened by the prospect of her spending time with other men. Instead, he wants to let her know that she gets home safe and to make sure she has fun.

Controlling, possessive and excessively jealous behaviour can be a red flag for a toxic relationship: the relationships charity Relate warns that emotional abuse can include being made to feel guilty and telling you what you can or can't do.

If you need help, or suspect a friend might need support, there is always someone to speak to. Women's Aid's 24 hour helpline can be reached on 0808 2000 247, and the Men’s Advice Line can be phoned on 0808 801 0327.

If you're LGBT+. you can also contact Galop on 0800 999 5428.

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