Perhaps he would rig up a zipwire out of tinsel running from the top of your tree.
Or maybe you would want him to belt out the full Latin version of "O Come All Ye Faithful" as you wait for the Queen's Christmas Day message. But whatever the reason, Boris Johnson is overwhelmingly the most popular choice for a Christmas house guest among voters, the ComRes poll for The Independent on Sunday reveals.
Asked to choose from the top politicians, 44 per cent would want the Mayor of London round for some winterval wiff-waff. Ed Miliband is the second most popular choice – but is far behind on 16 per cent.
However, if a rogue sprout goes down the wrong way, voters don't see Mr Johnson as the best politician to administer first aid – he comes second to last on 15 per cent, with Mr Farage last on 11 per cent.
The Prime Minister is seen by 29 per cent as being the best for carrying out the kiss of life, with Mr Clegg second on 25 per cent and Mr Miliband third on 21 per cent.