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8 bizarre things YouTube 'time travellers' have said about the future

Picture:
Picture:
ApexTV/YouTube

After the year that we've had, it might be nice to do a spot of time travelling.

We could all go to the future and see what happens with Brexit or what state Donald Trump leaves the planet in. It could open up some sort of awful space-time continuum when we return ranting and raving about the terrible consequences of global warming or when Beyonce becomes president by default of just being awesome.

You could alternatively go into the past and stop Donald Trump from agreeing to be on the Celebrity Apprentice or teach Ed Miliband to eat a bacon sandwich properly, which would also do David Cameron a massive favour as people would stop sharing THAT tweet.

Anyway, the time travel genre has had something of a revival on the internet this year. If 2017, was the year when Flat Earthers were out in force spouting their unsupported theories, 2018 was the year of the YouTube time travellers who shared their experiences of the future in low-res videos and became minor online celebrities.

These folks are hardly Marty McFly but have probably watched Primer one too many times and have literally zero evidence of their travels - but they're kinda likeable. They don't use their platform to promote any sort of rhetoric and appear almost bashful about their stories, remaining coy and lacking almost no charisma. Their stories are almost 100 per cent false but they are oddly endearing.

The YouTube channel ApexTV has tapped into this and made something of a cottage industry out of it - and were aren't complaining about that at all, because mad theories and wild stories about the future are the only things distracting us from the never-ending doom and gloom of 2018.

So, if you fancy a giggle and a look at how the future definitely won't turn out then join us on this greatest hits journey of all the wonderful things that 'time travellers' have said in the last 12 months about the future.

1. Aliens will invade the Earth in ten years time.

The most-famous and consistent of these time travellers is a man named Noah who claims to be from the year 2030. He says he was sent back in time by some secretive government mission, which he failed, meaning he's now stuck here. He first started to make a name for himself at the start of this year after taking part in a lengthy Q and A on Apex and has since been popping up here and there armed with 'footage' from the future. He seems like a decent enough bloke who has just tapped into a niche on the internet, but some of his theories are pretty fun and interesting.

He believes that by 2028 aliens will have arrived on Earth and will be living among us. However, he's kept his cards close to his chest and declared that they're just as 'smart as us' and look like 'humans'.

There's a common misconception that they are going to be smarter than us. They are just as smart as us. They just are more advanced in space travel. That is why they are able to come to us. 

They landed around Northern Asia, Northern Europe and Antarctica. Multiple powerful people managed to meet with them and aliens are not like you would expect. Basically, they look like us humans.

2. North Korea and South Korea will go to war against each other.

Although it looked like things were improving during 2018 between North and South Korea respectively, Noah has some grave news to report about the neighbouring nations in the Korean Peninsula.

By 2030, they will both be at war against each other. The conflict will not escalate into World War III but will involve the United States and Japan, which is slightly reassuring. However, he was reticent to release too much information about the war out of fear of creating a paradox.

It was basically a bunch of countries – I’m only going to say three of them because I don’t want to cause any paradox. United States, Japan and South Korea.

3. Governments will have access to time travel by 2028.

In the same year that aliens are due to land on Earth, time travel will also be a real thing that governments will unveil to the public. Oh boy! Roll on 2028!.

In the future there will be aliens and time travel. It will be open to the public in 2028.

We're not sure it's such a good idea to give the public access to such powerful machines, but the first thing this writer will do is travel back to 2011 and stop himself from leaving that rare Paris Saint-Germain scarf on a bus in Loughborough. That was a bad day.

4. Several countries will rise to newfound prominence.

It's not complete doom and gloom in the future, as several countries that would not be deemed superpowers now apparently become very important and influential on the global stage in the next 10-12 years.

Those include India and the Philippines, the latter of which combines with nine other countries to create one giant super nation. The same can't be said for Mexico, who run into a spot of bother with food shortages.

This 'time traveller' also shares a map of the United States in the future, showing that the shape of the country has been completely changed thanks to rising sea levels. This is a little ridiculous as he could have just made the map himself but, you can't knock a guy for trying.

5. Yolanda Renee King will be the President by 2030.

This is really the only story that Noah has shared that is in anyway fascinating. By the year 2030, he says, Yolanda Renee King, the granddaughter of Martin Luther King Jr, will be elected as the president of the United States.

At this current time King is only 10, meaning that in 12 years time she will only be 22, but Noah states that thanks to changes in legislation, younger people will be able to run for president. The current minimum age is 35.

In 2030 there will be a new President – Yolanda Renee King. She’s the first President to be in the new law where you’re able to be very young. She’s sworn into office at 21.

This might sound utterly ridiculous that someone could be president at such as young age, but given that she gave an awesome speech at the March for Our Lives earlier this years, it doesn't seem too farfetched.

6. Dinosaurs have a revival.

Away from Noah, whose videos are kind of like that Paul Whitehouse character from The Fast Show that used to say 'brilliant' all-the-time, other so-called time travellers have been attempting to get in on the game.

However, their reports of the future are much broader and out there, as they tend to go to the very distant future, so it's unlikely that we will ever see any of this come to pass. This is why we like Noah, because at least he's not travelling to the year 10,191 and keeps things a bit closer to home.

Of the more fantastical stories is this woman who apparently went to the year 6000, where dinosaurs had made an against all odds comeback and were briefly housed in zoos. We think Steven Spielberg made a film about that once.

7. Telepathy will become our main form of communication.

To be honest, this already sounds great, as we're tired of being forced to verbally communicate with people or send them WhatsApp messages only for a network data system to go down, leaving us stranded and confused.

Sadly, if you like the sound of pretending to be Professor X, then you''ll be disappointed to hear that this doesn't become commonplace until 8973, which is totally unacceptable and just far too long for anyone to realistically wait.

A man named William Taylor, who has claimed to have travelled to such a period in time, said:

The main method of communication was telepathy. So the internet, in terms of a communication tool, was probably pretty outdated by that point.

We'd also like to give a little shout out to William as he is one of the few YouTube time travellers who doesn't hide his face and appears to have some sort of dress sense. However, having a copy of 'A Brief History of Time' is a little too cliched for our liking.

8. Artificial intelligence governs the world.

One last final shout out to this guy from the year 2045, who probably put in the best acting performance of the lot of them and should probably get some sort of awards nomination come the start of next year.

His video is probably the most confusing one we've seen, as he can't decide whether by 2045 having the whole planet governed by one artificial intelligence that invades every aspect of our privacy and society is a bad thing or not.

Much like Noah, he is also on a secret mission and appears to be lost. He also has footage of the future which looks like graphics from a PlayStation 2 game. We're not buying his story, but we'll give him a 9/10 for effort and ticking all the YouTube 'time-travel' boxes.

More: This is how you can travel back in time on Twitter

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