
The news story of the Ever Given being stuck in the Suez Canal gripped the world for the best part of a week and we all worked hard to find original ways of describing the event, rather than just saying: yep, it’s still stuck.
But, some writers have taken it to a whole new level, by penning fan-fiction – some of which can best be described as rather erotic – about the giant container ship.
The relationship between a boat and a waterway is not, perhaps, the most obvious source of inspiration for love stories, but each to their own. And there’s no arguing that it makes for some interesting reading.
Maybe it’s just me - and the impact of a year in lockdown - but when Archive of Your Own author Rooftop_Goldfish wrote: “The Suez Canal didn’t think they believed in love at first sight, until love at first sight happened. Technically it was love at first grounding-resulting-in-total-obstruction, but love at first sight sounded so much sweeter” – well, it made me emotional.
Just me? Maybe not, considering there are dozens of stories of a similar nature on the fan-fiction publishing site.
Read more:
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- 35 of the funniest memes about the Ever Given as the ship is freed from the Suez Canal
- Wendy’s chicken sandwich nightmare sparks fierce TikTok debate
In one, entitled The Sweet Suez, which has garnered more than 13,000 reads on Archive of Our Own, it describes how the Ever Given got stuck in the Suez Canal after the winds acted as her “subtle invitation to spend time together”. As a result, it says the departure of the ship from the waterway caused joy for the rest of the world, but “mourning” for the Ever Given.
HELP https://t.co/jig9DRLHLl— Ash ™ (@Ash ™) 1616886334
The story, by user All_my_fandoms_are_killing me, is certainly the most popular on the site –also going viral on social media site Tumblr – but there are dozen of other stories romanticising the relationship between the boat and canal.
A passage from another, entitled Suez, My Beloved, reads: “They stay like that, held tight in each other’s embrace, as the sun dips below the horizon. It’s cold at night, but Suez simply holds Ever Given close, warming each other through the frozen air until the sun reappears again.”
lmao @catesish has just alerted me to the fact that, yes, there is fanfic sipping the Ever Given with the Suez Cana… https://t.co/3Iad6GAvKR— Ryan Broderick (@Ryan Broderick) 1616684923
In an emotional marker of the departure of the Ever Given from the Suez Canal, authorSpaceWaffleHouseTM writes:
“Goodbye, Ever Given, I’ll never forget you.”
The Canal sniffles as the ship moves on into the remainder of her tight channel. “Nor I, you.” Then all they can do is watch as the other fades into the distance, leaving their watery affair to be nothing but a memory.
The fan-fiction certainly gave people who don’t want the Suez drama to end something to cling onto...
Ever Given/Suez Canal is now an AO3 tag with multiple fics and all I can say is “God bless fandom, never has it shi… https://t.co/kkhIso1uQE— Nea (@Nea) 1616753604
Y’all, there are 68 works of fanfic on AO3 under the Ever Given/Suez Canal pairing. 👀. This two shot seems kind of… https://t.co/kbpD8jFAwe— Alex Johnson (@Alex Johnson) 1616901776
Okay so now apparently there's Suez Canal/Ever Given fanfic and my soul has left my body https://t.co/smIJkx28od— Liz Buh-jolly-uh #ShutDownRedHill (@Liz Buh-jolly-uh #ShutDownRedHill) 1616966810
However, the content from some of the fan-fiction is, honestly, far too explicit to share here.
I have been alerted to the Ever Growin’ number of Ever Given fan fiction, including such glorious titles as “A Gent… https://t.co/jEP9rhMqeO— T Maya Kanwal (@T Maya Kanwal) 1616814033
It certainly brings a new meaning to the phrase “deck pics”, anyway.