More constructive advice comes from psychologists, scientists, sex therapists and the men themselves, who probably have some idea of what they do and don’t like. Obviously everything is subjective due to the individual’s needs and wants – but these are 5 of the best pieces of advice for women, from men.
1) They need your honesty
Brendan Tapley, a writer for Women’s Day, says it’s ‘easy’ for men to dismiss bedroom problems as female disinterest, so encourages women to speak up if there’s a bigger issue at hand.
2) Tell them what they’re doing right
Dr Barry McCarthy, a certified sex and marriage therapist, says many men find it erotically charging when the woman is affirming during sex. Men respond well to praise, so being vocal about what works for you works for them as well.
3) Be confident
Cosmopolitan polled men to find out what had contributed to the best sex they’d ever had, and a recurring answer was ‘confidence’. Not only was this a turn-on for the men who responded, it also encouraged them to take their minds off their own insecurities.
4) Be willing to talk about their fantasies
Psychotherapist and sexologist Dr Joe Kort says men want to share their fantasies but worry that they’ll be shamed or judged. Encourage them to speak up and let them know about yours as well – maybe you’ll find you have some in common.
5) Be the one who initiates sex
An anonymous male writer on Quora says "knowing your partner wants it just as much as you is just about the most awesome feeling in the world". Like women, men aren’t in the mood for sex all the time, but showing you desire your partner is important to maintain a healthy relationship.
Gay women have these five pieces of sex advice for straight men