A book of recipes titled ‘Corridors of Flour’ is one of the latest bits of merchandise being offered by the Tories on their online shop, and it’s exactly what you’d expect from the Conservative Party.

On sale for £24.95, the cookbook features foodie favourites from prime ministers, peers, MPs, police and crime commissioners and more.

A description of the product reads: “For the first time in thirty years, the Conservative Party has published a cookbook — and it’s guaranteed to get you turning on the hob and heating up the oven.

“From soups to oatcakes, scones to pasta, these recipes are perfect for quiet nights in — not to mention dinner parties, birthday parties, and any kind of party except the Labour Party.

“So go on, get your copy today and make your meals the toast of the town.”

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Speaking of toast, Boris Johnson’s offering is unsurprisingly uninspired, offering up his own take on cheese on toast. His “oven-ready” Brexit deal has probably gone off at this point.

For best results, we’re told you have to “keep grilling until the edges of the cheese have turned brown and perforated and are faintly scabby in appearance and texture”.

We understand the prime minister isn’t referring to himself here, and we’re rather surprised that Liz Truss didn’t offer up this recipe, given how often she likes to talk about cheese.

That. Is. A. Disgrace.

And we think we can safely say that there’s nothing about cheese with a little bit of wine in this book.

Elsewhere, Bishop Auckland MP Dehenna Davison offers up a bacon-and-Wotsit-topped mac and cheese, while the late former prime minister Margaret Thatcher’s recipe is suitably fishy: fish cakes.

Slim pickings from a party which had to U-turn on giving children free school meals, if you ask us.

Thankfully we can only see a small selection of the recipes on the Conservative Party website, but we noted a distinct lack of gammon for the Brexiteers.

No Eton Mess in sight, either.

Oh well.

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