Boris Johnson comes under fire in first PMQs since wounding confidence vote
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Take a look here.It would be nice to be proud of our government, as the last pulses of patriotic spirit ebb through the country after the Platinum Jubilee.

But when we are governed by the Tories, it is pretty difficult to find anything to be thrilled about.

Indeed, in the last week alone, we learnt that a substantial proportion of his own MPs don't even like Boris Johnson and voted against him in a vote of no confidence.

And don't get us started on what has been another grim week for MPs defending the controversial Rwanda plan, losing their s**t at the BBC and distracting the public with half-baked policies.

Or do get us started: here are 17 of the worst things the Tories did this week.

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1. Acted dodgily enough to face a no-confidence vote

Our hopes at being eased back into Normal Life after the bank holiday were dashed when we woke up on Monday morning to news that enough members of the Tory party had had enough of their leader, triggering a vote of no confidence in him.


2. That clashed with Love Island

It clashed with the biggest dating show of the summer, which is grounds enough for Johnson's resignation in our books.


3. But voted to keep the PM

But despite showing enough bottle to make him face the music, 211 Tory MPs decided that "yeah, this animated scarecrow is probably the best PM we could get". Thanks, Tories. Still, with 148 MPs voting against him, there wasn't exactly a ringing endorsement of the leader.


4. Showed a lack of remorse about Partygate

But if you thought that would make Johnson feel a little humble, think again. Instead of mea culpa-ing round Westminster ahead of the vote, he reportedly told MPs: "I'd do it again" regarding his Partygate conduct.

A government source told the Independent that he was specifically referring to the fact that “he would thank staff for their hard work when they left his employment” but as ever with big dog, the optics weren't giving.

Bizarrely, that wasn't enough to turn loyalists into enemies, but there we go.


5. Then moaned about the BBC...

BBC

So, as Johnson intercepted yet another bullet and woke up to another day as prime minister, the country chewed over the evening's events and analysed what it all meant. And one Tory MP complained the BBC had treated Johnson like Hannibal Lecter...


6. ...Twice...

Then Lee Anderson said the BBC, Labour party and mainstream media were involved in a "witch hunt" against Johnson.


7. ...Thrice

And Dominic Raab moaned that the broadcaster's Victoria Derbyshire was being "partisan" for daring to call into question the government's record.

What a day.


8. Chatted nonsense about a 'Blockbuster NHS'

But the party couldn't navel gaze forever and so it was time to forget the Shakespearean psychodramas of Westminster and look outwards to the country, and make some policy.

First up to bat was health secretary Sajid Javid who appeared to play some sort of noughties reference bingo while talking about the NHS.

If you think we are being cryptic, fair enough, but what he and Downing Street spokespeople said was even more so. bl


9. Gave a less than exciting housing speech

Oh well, that's health... dealt with? But what about housing? The big man himself, Johnson, gave a speech on Thursday to set the world to rights on the issue and now there are no homeless people and getting on the housing ladder is easier then getting on an actual ladder.

... In our dreams.

He actually chuntered on about tariffs on olives and bananas, his Right to Buy ideas were criticised by experts and he failed to admit he hadn't met manifesto homebuilding targets.


10. That was potentially inspired by Labour

And were his ideas even his? We're not sure. He used the slogan “on your side” ten times, making it clear it is his new favourite slogan.

Now this could be a coincidence but...


11. Failed to deal with Ireland

Ah well. How's he doing with Ireland? Well Ireland's PM Micheal Martin reckons the British government appears to have no political will to resolve its festering trade dispute with the European Union and risks endangering peace in Northern Ireland.

He gave a speech about the issue as tensions over the Northern Ireland Protocol continue.

Ah...


12. Or the borders

The borders are alright though... right? Potentially, except the government’s borders inspector has spoken out about his “frustration” at not being able to meet home secretary Priti Patel once since his appointment more than 14 months ago.

The Immigration Service Union (ISU) told The Independent that Ms Patel had also rejected requests to meet leaders representing borders staff to discuss the small boats crisis.

Ah...


13. Wasted money

Meanwhile, Rishi Sunak has been accused of failing to act to save around £11bn of taxpayers' money that has been used to pay interest on government debt.

The National Institute of Economic and Social Research think tank said the losses were due to the Treasury failing to insure against interest rate rises.

Small change, really...


14. And PPE

And millions of unused masks and other bits of PPE that was bought at the height of the Covid pandemic are to be burned or recycled.

It amounts to £4bn worth but the government said it was good to get so much in at the start of Covid.


15. Pissed of Domino's

Things went from bad to worse for the government when even pizza chain Domino's got involved with negging them:


16. And Ben&Jerry's

And when they were done with their snarky mains, the Tories were served ice cream with a side of criticism, when Ben&Jerry's slammed the Rwanda plan:


17. And government staff

Speaking of Rwanda, it looks like the civil servants charged with implementing the policy are not happy about it. Speaking to Sky News, one worker said there was "disbelief" in their department about the policy and said it felt like they were taking part in “human trafficking”.

Tom Hunt, who is Conservative MP for Ipswich, told the anonymous worker to "go and find another job" after they voiced their opposition to the controversial plans.


Still, we all have confidence in Boris Johnson, don't we?

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