Ukrainians are responding to Russia’s nuclear threats with plans for one huge orgy

It hopefully goes without saying that Ukrainians are absolute machines – from removing land mines with their bare hands with a lit cigarette in their mouth to telling Elon Musk to “f*** off”.

Now, it seems, they’re responding to increased aggression from their Russian invaders with their typical brand of “mega-optimism”: by organising a massive orgy, of course.

According to multiple reports, more than 15,000 are up for getting steamy on a hill close to the capital of Kyiv, should President Vladimir Putin decide to heat things up a bit himself in the form of a nuclear bomb.

Attendees of the “Orgy in Shchekavytska: Official” event – reportedly shared on a Telegram channel – have been told to a stripe coding system on their hands to indicate what type of sex they’re after at the rowdy romp.

Meanwhile, organisers have apparently noted that “all apartments with a view of Shchekavytska have for some reason disappeared from real estate sites”.

We wonder why.

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Drag artist and former Eurovision Song Contest entrant Verka Serduchka expressed support for the unusual event on Instagram last week, writing “we are almost there”.

Of course, local residents are supportive of the idea too, with one telling RadioFreeEurope the action is “the opposite of despair”.

She said: “Even in the worst-case scenario, people will look for something good. That’s the mega-optimism of Ukrainians.”

One male citizen added: “It’s an attempt to show that the more they try to scare us, the more we will transform it into something else.”

Another said: “Humour helps. It’s a response to the Russian threat. Everything will be OK.”

The bizarre news story comes amid reports Ukraine is handing out anti-radiation pills to its citizens after president Putin previously warned Russia would use “all means at our disposal” if his country is under threat.

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