Boris Johnson has finally announced he is to resign after days of pressure.
After his handling of the Chris Pincher scandal opened the floodgates to 54 resignations from members of his government, including Rishi Sunak and Sajid Javid, he no longer had enough support from his party to go on - so it has been reported he is announcing he will leave.
So what can he do next? After all, we can't imagine the arrogant figure returning to the backbenches with his tail between his legs, so a life outside politics is probably the one for Johnson.
But despite all that dodgy funding, when the refurb was reported at the time in April 2021, people were mostly shocked to learn of expensive gold wallpaper and lots of other tat adorning the flat, rescuing it from its days of being a “John Lewis nightmare”.
Johnson clearly has some wacky interior design ideas, so where better to put them in action than Grand Designs?
When he’s not painting, Johnson has been spotted a few times out and about going for a run in entirely inappropriate clothes. And if he manages to, for instance, pelt it down the streets of Manchester in dress shoes, he must be pretty good at it.
One to watch for the next Olympics... Maybe.
5. Write a book
He’s already written a fair few books, but it seems disgraced politicians have become rather fond of locking themselves in their studies and begging Penguin for a meeting recently if this guy is anything to go by.
Time for Johnson to do the same.
Suggested title: The Johnson Years: How I lost Public Trust with Parties and Sleaze allegations
Everyone knows Johnson loves a slogan, bless him. He first became obsessed with three word comms strategies with 'Get Brexit Done', then frothed at the mouth over variations of 'Build Back Better'. He then said 'Get Boosted Now' to everyone who would listen during the coronavirus pandemic so it is clear Johnson would make a pretty good Mad Men era ads man, able to flog just about anything to the public. Like:
Toothpaste: 'Get Plaque Gone.'
Pubs: 'Get P***** Now.'
He’ll be a natural.
7. Professional apologiser
Given how many times Johnson has had to apologise in the last few months - over Pincher, Partygate and more - he has honed his skills and therefore people should really be able to whack him a tenner to do their dirty work for them.
He is resigning but he managed to cling onto power for absolutely ages despite everything that was thrown at him. This is a man good at dodging death, then. Becoming a stuntman makes perfect sense.